OOH OOH
| OOH OOH | |
|---|---|
| Village | |
| Established | 5 June 2022 |
| Government | |
| • President | Commander Humphrey |
| Population (8 June 2022) | |
| • Total | 1 |
| Demonym(s) | Monkey |
(The following article was prepared by Director Spicy Monkey of Uhovia from an interview with President Commander Humphrey, OOH OOH’s leader, on June 8, 2022.)
OOH OOH is a settlement located in the jungle in central western Arith. It is the only known settlement which houses Monkeys and is led by Commander Humphrey, the only known Monkey survivor of a Human attack on the village. It serves as the capital of the Banana Republic, a nation once populated by Monkeys which fell into ruin due to attacks from Humans.
Geography
OOH OOH is located in the middle of a small tropical jungle, on the eastern slope of Mount Kigoma in central Arith. Its location close to Lake Tanganyika to the south ensures steady rainfall throughout the year, while the fertile soil allows a variety of plant life to flourish, including the once-gigantic “Thousand-Year Heaven Tree,” a desecrated religious landmark to the west of the settlement.
As for the town itself, the stone ruins on the ground are partially buried underneath a mudslide, while the more recent buildings constructed during the reign of President Commander Humphrey are located in the trees above and embedded into the mountain.
History
Pre-Humphry
“I not know whole history. History gets lost in time, especially in Monkey where we no write good” – President Commander Humphry
Little is known about OOH OOH’s history before President Commander Humphry’s lifetime. According to Humphry, the lands upon which OOH OOH was built belonged to his ancestors, where they worshipped the Heaven Tree and likely constructed the stone ruins seen in the settlement today. For unknown reasons, the ancestors abandoned the area, where it remained uninhabited for an unknown period of time.
The Gombe War
In the year 1974 MT (Monkey Time), Humphrey, still a Commander at the time, led a group of 29 adult Monkeys and their young into the area surrounding the ruins. Soon after arriving, Charlie and Hugh, two high-ranking Monkeys, created a splinter group of about 9 adult Monkeys and their young and separated from the rest of the group. In retaliation, Humphrey led his 20 Monkeys in a war on the separatists. Over the course of the war, Humphrey himself killed 10 Monkeys and captured 3, ultimately extinguishing the separatists altogether. This war established Humphrey as the unquestioned leader of the Monkeys, prompting him to form the Banana Republic and become elected as President Commander Humphrey.
Attack By Solaris
On June 6 2022, Emperor Melevor of the Solar Empire of Arith discovered OOH OOH within his claimed territory. Not knowing the intelligence of the Monkeys and wanting to keep them from disrupting the upcoming international ball in Sun Harvest nearby, he announced his intention to kill all of the Monkeys unless they vacated the area.
Enraged by this declaration, President Commander Humphrey gathered 6 other Monkeys and even hired a Human mercenary, Twyst, to repel the incoming eviction force. Sure enough, when the Solarians led by Melevor arrived at OOH OOH, they were almost immediately ambushed and driven away, with Melevor himself being wounded by a Monkey during the fighting. After only losing one Monkey, Humphrey sent Twyst to offer peace negotiations, but was soon kidnapped by Melevor, put into Sandhof Zoo in Solar Pyrrhus, and fitted with a shock collar. The Solarians then accused him of attempting to harm a Solarian child and shot him with an arrow, leaving him seriously wounded.
Luckily for Humphrey, his Monkeys came to his rescue, scaling the walls of Solar Pyhrrus and carrying him out of the zoo. Sadly, however, as they escaped from the city, the Solarian armed forces shot at and killed all of the Monkeys except for Humphrey then burned the Heaven Tree and drove the rest of the Monkeys away from OOH OOH. The once-proud leader of OOH OOH was without a tribe to lead, and now faces an uncertain future.
Government
OOH OOH is governed as a democratic republic. It holds weekly elections for the presidency which are overseen by Commander Humphrey.
Laws
Each of the laws of OOH OOH are written on a log wall in the town square about 3 meters in height. They are as follows:
- We run a republic where elections are held weekly.
- It is illegal to vote for anyone who isn’t Commander Humphrey.
- Do not anger Humphrey.
- Your duty is to serve Humphrey to the fullest.
- Monkey.
Honorary Monkeys
Although OOH OOH's society was almost entirely Monkeys, there are ways of becoming an honorary Monkey, mainly by proving one's worth to President Commander Humphrey.
Presidency
Commander Humphrey oversees most of the bureaucratic functions of OOH OOH, including elections, military command, and general administration. He lives in the Plank House, a two-story treetop house outfitted with a bed, his favorite melon, and several fascinating technologies discovered by Humphrey himself, including a door-opening device for his front door fashioned from stone. The second floor offers a rooftop view of OOH OOH and the surrounding jungle.
Culture
The Thousand-Year Heaven Tree
To the west of the village, the remains of a massive tree once worshipped by the ancestors of Humphrey and the Monkeys of OOH OOH lie perched on the top of Mount Kigoma. Its trunk is approximately 12 meters in diameter at the base and is estimated to have been about 50 meters tall.
From an interview with President Commander Humphrey, the Heaven Tree has existed for at least one-thousand years and was regarded as a religious landmark by himself and his ancestors. It was burned down during a raid by the Solarian Army.
Ruins
OOH OOH is built over the partly-buried ruins of a previous settlement by an unknown group, possibly Humphry’s ancestors. The ruins consist of a collection of small, crumbling stone brick huts clustered around a central plaza containing a well and two small artificial ponds, with a short road leading westward into a tunnel reinforced with more stone bricks. The tunnel then leads into a wide natural cavern.
One interesting feature of these ruins is the material used to make the huts, road, and tunnel. The cobbles are held together with a unique type of moss, giving them increased durability and resilience against the unforgiving tropical climate.
Food
The primary staple of OOH OOH is the banana, a species previously thought to be extinct on Arith. President Commander Humphrey explains that he pioneered a genetic modification technique that altered a nearby relative of the banana, the carrot, to imitate its color, taste, and texture. The “Humphrey Banana” matches virtually all historical descriptions of the fruit, and is eaten in breads, jellies, or by itself. A special form of banana, the Enchanted Golden Banana, is kept in a special container by Humphrey for ceremonial purposes.
Besides bananas, the residents of OOH OOH enjoy melons and cocoa beans.
The Banana, The Rock, and Humphrey
According to Humphrey, the three main values of OOH OOH are bananas, rocks, and himself. Bananas provide sustenance to the Monkeys, rocks provide protection, and Humphrey provides order and leadership.